Wednesday, May 12, 2010

In The Begining...

God created the Blog.

Well, sort of. First, he created teenage girls. He said, "And lo, there shall descend upon the Earth humans of the female persuasion who have reached physical maturity but have yet to calm themselves down long enough to realize it. They shall scream a lot, dye their hair, have passive aggressive conflicts with their fellow kind, question their identity, be as over dramatic as possible, and probably have a crush on David Boreanaz."

And so it came to pass that there were teenage girls. And there was much eye-rolling.

Eventually, God became bored, and so he created the internet, so he could play online Poker with Jesus and the Holy Spirit, and occasionally with Zeus, who sometimes felt a bit left out. It didn't take long before humanity ended up getting in on this as well, and so God was forced to share his creation with those below him.

But humanity did strange things to the internet. Rather than using it for responsible things, like gaming and watching porn, human beings started using it as a form of communication. They invented things like "Instant Messanger" and "Facebook" and the cosmically reviled "Twitter." They began to voice their opinions on things, to each other, and to themselves, opinions on things ranging from politics and religion to Miley Cyrus' hair color, and it was then that God realized the need to organize things.

And so he created the Blog. He said, "And lo, there shall be on the internet applications similar to diaries. Humanity may share their thoughts there and pretend that other people care about their lives."

And there was much rejoicing.

But then came the day, that dreaded, legendary day, when the teenage girls that God had previously brought forth found the all holy invention of the Internet, and in turn, the even more holy invention of the Blog. There suddenly appeared a multitude of melodramatic entries; long, usually poorly written musings on the emotional state of the writer, vague attempts to sound profound. This madness escalated until one day God said "Enough! Please go to college."

And so this Blog was born.

Hello. My name is Nelly. This is my Blog. This is a continuation of my previous Blog "The World Is Very Strange" which I kept all four years of High School and continues to be an embarrassing though important part of who I am today. That Blog is a lot more personal, and has a lot of teenage emo moments. This Blog will, hopefully, be different. I'll try to keep the tone casual, to write opinion pieces rather than diary entries. Every now and then I'll probably throw in a little update as to what I'm up to, just because I can. I'm not expecting a huge amount of people to ever read this, but you never know.

In the meantime, wilkommen, bienvenue, welcome. We're glad to have you here =D

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